


thinking about my feelings never did me any good

by seameetsearth



Series: two dumbasses slowly figure out they're in love [1]
Category: The Wayhaven Chronicles (Interactive Fiction)
Genre: Anxiety?, Fluff, Mentions of Sex, Other, Spooning, too much navel gazing probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26864623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seameetsearth/pseuds/seameetsearth
Summary: The detective accidentally spends the night in Mason's room and almost has a conniption over it.
Relationships: Detective/Mason (The Wayhaven Chronicles), Nonbinary Detective/Mason (The Wayhaven Chronicles)
Series: two dumbasses slowly figure out they're in love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1993708
Comments: 10
Kudos: 26





	thinking about my feelings never did me any good

Coming back to consciousness was a slow affair.

The first sensation to return was a familiar dull ache radiating from their lower half, a pleasant reminder of the evening's activities. Revelling in it for a few moments brought a smile to Billie's face that was really a bit embarrassing in just how wide it was, so they shifted to hide their face into their pillow. That, however, brought on another sensation that was more surprising - this wasn't their pillow.

The smile drained as Billie slowly lifted their head back up and opened their eyes. It took a few moments for their eyesight - poor at the best of times, honestly - to focus enough to discern that this was not the usual location of their... encounters with Mason.

This was, in fact, Mason's room.

A gentle shifting sound drew their attention, and they turned to their side to see Mason laying on his stomach, shoulderblades falling slightly as he exhaled a breath in sleep.

It was really quite something to see. His face was turned away, cheek pressed into the pillow, which was somehow both a disappointment and a relief; but now that their eyes had adjusted to the dark, they could see the defined slopes and curves of the lean muscles in his back. His freckles were a little harder to spot, and they couldn't have stopped the unconscious lean forward to refine their vision even if they had tried.

A bit closer, they could see the clusters of dots all across the wide expanse of tanned skin, and the smile that had dropped before returned with a vengeance as they let their eyes roam to their content.

This... was not something they ever got to see. Not Mason's back - that was something they had seen quite a few times by this point - but him just... peacefully resting. Billie was something of a heavy sleeper themself, so after a few rounds of fun, they would always be conked out until morning - by which time Mason was always long gone. And with that thought came a realization that felt like a bucket of ice water being poured over their head.

Mason never stayed. That was the thing, he was very clear when they began this... engagement that it was just sex. No feelings, no complications; and Billie had tentatively agreed, against their better judgement. Mason was rather good at getting Billie to go along with what were almost always bad ideas, seemingly without even trying very hard; an admittedly almost obnoxious level of professionalism had helped to keep any shenanigans out of their office at the station, but anywhere that didn't require Billie to prove themselves worthy of the duties given to them were less than safe.

Really, they should have been more concerned about how easy it was to let themselves be swayed by those pretty, stormy eyes and the way he would move towards them with a very definite, singular purpose in mind and how he had a way of making any room feel twenty degrees hotter even when the rest of Unit Bravo were _still in the room Mason please_. But being concerned about it would mean having to actually _think_ about it, which Billie was adamantly and actively refusing to do, because thinking about it could only complicate things.

Thinking about it would lead to thinking about how, despite how their pulse would race and their ears would burn, they never felt safer than when they were in his arms. About how more than once they've caught themselves getting distracted at work, remembering not how he smirked down at them in bed, eyes dark and gleaming, but how he grinned when they had actually joined Felix in teasing Ava about her attitude for once.

("I'm just saying! He's not entirely wrong," they defended Felix. "You can be a little... uptight."

"I believe that's a bit hypocritical coming from you, detective," she had commented dryly, eyebrow raised.

"Oh, I'm aware," they had said. "But that doesn't make it less true."

Nat had chuckled quietly from her book, and the bark of laughter from Mason had Billie mirroring his grin.)

None of that was fair to Mason. He wanted simple. He wanted uncomplicated fun. He didn't want feelings that would make things messy or their jobs harder and that was understandable. It was bad enough that Billie found so many moments of their day spent just remembering things like how his hair felt running through their fingers as they scrambled for purchase; if feelings got involved and things went south, there was no way the rest of Unit Bravo or their work would be unaffected, and staying in his bed after sex would be... crossing a feeling line?

Emotions really weren't their strong suit.

Thinking about their feelings, which unfortunately often ran counter to what was obviously the objectively correct course of action, was bad. Nothing good would come of it, so they shoved it down and locked it up and only occasionally allowed themselves to listen to the rattling of their heart inside its cage.

Steadfastly ignoring their pounding heart, Billie tried to stop their mind from running away and panicking about feelings they refused to consider by figuring out just what they were actually going to _do_ about this.

So, the facts.

One. Mason never stayed. Therefore, Billie shouldn't stay either. Easy, nothing to even contemplate here. Frankly, they've probably stayed too long as it is, staring at the arrays of freckles on his back, lingering on one cluster before slowly dragging to the next, tracing the line where the sheets met his hips -

Stop. Next.

Two. Mason was asleep, and Billie was awake. Therefore, now was the optimal time to leave.

Three. In order to leave, they need to first find their glasses. Where were their glasses?

Billie had only been in here once before, when Mason was recovering from the Trappers' assault, and they hadn't exactly been paying much attention to the decor at that time. Reluctantly, they tore their eyes away from Mason's back and scanned the room.

They had come in the door and Mason had abruptly shut it behind them and crowded them against it. They had... spent some time there (don't think about it don't linger _his hands cupped their ass and_ _s_ _queezed_ _as he dragged them against his_ -)

Nope, obviously not there. A table? Dresser? When had they taken them off?

Shit. There was also another problem, even if they found the frames. It simply wouldn't be possible for Mason to sleep as heavily as they do - personal idiosyncrasies aside, his hypersenses would undoubtedly register them poking around his room.

Reconsider fact three. Are the glasses necessary? They could leave without them. Well, they couldn't leave the warehouse; while they did keep a spare pair in the glove compartment of their car, they had walked here today to enjoy the last remnants of spring's cool breezes before summer's annual onslaught began. But they could retire to their own room for the rest of the night at least, allow Mason the privacy he always afforded them, and inquire politely in the morning proper. That would be an awkward conversation in and of itself, but...

Yes, that seemed the safest bet. Least chance of waking Mason, greatest chance of avoiding an "Oh hey, didn't mean to wake you, go back to sleep" conversation, absolutely no chance of acknowledging how _god, they really didn't want to leave at all, he was so warm next to them_ -

Right, time to go.

With a firm resolution not to look back and start counting each freckle to delay this any longer, Billie pulled the covers back and shifted their legs off the bed. As soon as their feet touched the floor, they felt a tug and the world shifted and suddenly they were back on the bed and looking at the ceiling?

"Quiet down." Gruff, gravelly - oh. Mason was awake. Well, shit.

"I didn't say anything," Billie whispered. Mason had pulled them back from the edge of the bed and had turned so that now he was on his side and had one arm slung across their middle, pressing them alongside him. They could feel the drag of his stubble as he buried his face in the space between their shoulder and the pillow, and try as they might, they couldn't stop their ears from burning in response.

"Didn't have to. Heart's pounding a mile a minute."

Ah. So much for their carefully considered plan. But now, with his arm around them and his breath warming their skin, they were finding it harder and harder to start a new thread of logic to get out of this.

They looked down at his arm. The freckles that had dotted across his back spread here as well, and after a moment's hesitation, they brought one hand up to gently run their fingers across them, trying to find a recognizable pattern. They could feel Mason stiffen for just a second, then relax again with a only a huff as commentary. Not wholly unwelcome, then. Tolerated, at least. Was that was this was? Was he just tolerating this intrusion into his space, would it mean he would be less likely to allow Billie in again? Maybe not, he was never very picky about where they had fun before, but this was different, surely? This had to be a bad idea, they couldn't let themself be swayed into this like all the times before, this could be ruinous, this thing that they have was already tenuous and vague at best, this had to be crossing a line -

There was a growl and another tug and suddenly Billie was on their side, facing away from Mason, pulled in tight against his chest with both arms and legs tangled together. The tension Billie felt was keeping them from fully appreciating the position, though that did nothing to stop the flush from moving from their ears to their cheeks.

"What did I tell you?"

They let out a breath they hadn't known they were holding. Then took another, and gathered their courage. _Bite the bullet_.

"Sorry. It's just..." They rearranged their own arms until they could hold onto Mason's more comfortably. "...Is this really okay? Me... staying?"

They felt a scoff behind their head, gently displacing a few wisps of hair.

"Where would you even go?"

Ugh. This was taking more courage than Billie allotted for. "I could go to my own room. You don't have to let me stay here if you don't want to."

There was a long, long moment of silence. Long enough that Billie started to consider cutting their losses and writing off that pair of glasses entirely, really, they could just run home, pack their bags, move to the city, change their name; they would miss Unit Bravo and Tina and Verda and maybe even reminisce about Douglas and his stupid, shitty phone one day, but it would be better than dealing with the fallout of this.

But while Mason may be a tease, he never fails to follow through. His grip tightened just a bit.

"I never do anything I don't want to, sweetheart. If you don't know that by now, you aren't half as smart as everyone thinks you are."

A flush of warmth flowed through them that had (almost) nothing to do with the added heat from Mason's embrace, even as they let out a small huff of indignation. It wasn't the most tactful way to say it, but it still answered the unasked question. _Do you want me to stay?_

With that worry taken care of and any other thoughts or feelings on the matter resolutely shoved back where they came from because _we are not going to screw this up right now no thank you,_ Billie finally settled back against Mason's chest.

"Okay then." They could feel a shadow of a smile at the edge of their lips, the muscles barely twitching before they also settled as they let their eyes close again. "...Good night, Mason."

"'Night."

It didn't take much longer for Billie to fall back asleep, Mason's arms around them, legs entangled, and the ghost of Mason's lips resting on the back of their neck for the rest of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> I went back and forth over whether this should be in present or past tense and now it is almost unbearable for me to look at, so if this is in any way pleasant to read it will be a miracle. Please take this meagre offering and know that if you leave a comment and I don't respond it's because people terrify me but I do love you.


End file.
